creative block: my inner cheerleader

time consuming art making processes get me worried and very insecure---a feast of feelings for my inner critic!

my main concerns turn into a flurry of negative self-talk:

• who's to say your idea will even be good and worth it? (inner critic says "this is stupid.")
• what about all the time, energy and resources? (inner critic says "you should have been doing something else better. what a waste.")
• how do i know when it's time to quit or just push through? (inner critic says "don't be a wimp.")
• who cares and who is this benefiting? (inner critic says "no one cares. it's worthless.")
• is this good enough? (inner critic says "no. you're an impostor. it'll never be right.")

art can bring levity sometimes. i mean, in the grand scheme of things, i know choosing the wrong color or paper isn't going to ruin anyone's life. but the Mind Blocks these insecurities create are no less real and serious. they extend into ALL aspects of my life, creative or otherwise. and why hide that? shame is just another way for our inner critics to win. i know that many of us struggle with the exact same abusive self-talk.

but what if our inner critics were kind, gentle and nurturing? sure, tough love is good for us on occasion...but my inner critic certainly does NOT love me. not even close. i would never, ever be friends with someone like that and i definitely wouldn't listen to what they had to say about me if it was always bad!

how am i handling this lately? slowly! (actually, today was bad, hence this post).

90% of my worries and negative thoughts are product driven. end results. bottom lines. that is NOT my goal (though a good end product with some $ attached would be a nice addition!)
my goal is the Present and working through it...slushing, trundling, falling, running and maybe sometimes soaring through it and feeling accomplished in the WORK of that. our future selves don't even exist, yet our inner critic compares us to them constantly. how is this fair?

lately, i'm forcing myself to say "just decide and do something. at least it's something!" and then just being okay with the "doing something" part and not it's yield. these somethings are very small and often mundane, and it's still VERY challenging for me. but that's okay! it's still practice toward taming my evil inner critic and helping her to become a kind inner cheerleader instead. we all need one of those; it's rough out there.